Better Day
Mood:  a-ok
Today has definitely been better than yesterday. I didn't get any of the work done yesterday that I wanted to do, but tonight's gonna be the night! I feel it.

I had a good practice. Roxanne reorganized the singing groups. I'm really glad that there's going to be three rather than four because it gives us something to look forward to. I just wish I could learn how to sing a "part." Roxanne has so many leads that we have to split our time more often than those who are altos or sopranos. Plus we only have two guys, so they are neded desperately each week. I'm not about the stage thing either. I just get so excited looking out into our church and seeing people honestly feeling the Lord and getting into it. But we can see that from the risers as well, so that's cool.

I'm pretty lazy still today. But Brett and I have been playing games today and he's gotten bathed (which I can't say every day. He's a very difficult little boy to take care of.) So I'm glad about that. And I did clean out the fridge so that tomorrow we can go grocery shopping. Tonight is karate so we definitely can't do it tonight. I'm going to see if Deana can come over too and help me out a little. I think she should start getting Jon's allowance from now on.

Well well, I guess there's not much else to say for now.

www.one.org

Katie

My First "Blah" Blog Entry
Mood:  lazy
Okay, so I've decided to jump on the whole "blog thing" that's got everybody talking. It might even come in handy when someone has finally decided they have had enough of my bullcrap and wants to kill me. This could serve as evidence.

I should probably start this by saying that we have a VERY full household. Me, my darling husband Tony, our son Brett (2 1/2 years), our daughter Analisa (6 mos.) and our newest addition Jon! (A thirteen year old with an attitude, and a good heart.) I'm sure I'll be writing all about them.

I'm upset that my son swears. Brett doesn't swear like, all the time, but when he's frustrated, he'll say "stupid" or something like that. I just hope it's something all two and a half year old kids go through. I know my language is not so good in the car, but when we are here at home I do all that I can to make sure EVERYONE watches what they say. So that's bothering me.

I'm also having a really tough day with my anxiety. I feel my heart racing, and I feel like I'm very close to having a panic attack. I've been trying as hard as I can to take it easy and I feel like yesterday I took it a little TOO EASY. I don't think I left the house once. But today's been very difficult. My head feels dizzy, my breathing doesn't feel right, and I just have "that feeling." However, I have A LOT to look forward to. Wednesday is "church night." I get a chance to sing on our praise team, and I love that. I love worshipping God, I love the people I spend that time with, I just love getting out of the house and having that just for myself.

We're also leaving for vacation in a couple of weeks. So that's cool. I'm excited about the road trip to Chicago. It's going to be seven of us going up there: Me, Tony, Bubba, Analisa, Jon, Chip, and Deana. Woohoo. I just hope we don't kill each other.

As I write this it's bothering me that I know I have some things I need to be doing around the house: the dishes and the laundry mainly. But I just can't find the strength to force myself to do it. I keep telling myself I also need to get the kids ready so that we can go to Wal-Mart and buy baby food, diapers, stamps, and whatever else we might need. I feel like I'm not doing anything right now but having a self "pity party." It's been like that for a few weeks now, and I'm pretty sure I know why. I just don't want to go into any details I guess.

Let's pray that tomorrow is a better day. I'm going to get Analisa up from her nap soon, get to the store, pick up Jon, figure out how Tony is going to get home from the dentist, and then come home, cook dinner, and go to church. Maybe after church tonight Jon can help me with the laundry. I doubt that considering every Wednesday we come home pretty late. BUT TONIGHT MIGHT BE DIFFERENT.

Ugh.